Welcome to AllFaith Mental Health Hotline

To access our services
please choose from the following options.

They're right down here, just a little farther

Not much farther...

When you get to them make sure you click the right one or something disastrous might happen!!!!

If you forgot which one to click, go Here

There's other places you could go of course, like Here

Or maybe Here

But then you'd miss the buttons.

And you wouldn't want to miss the buttons of course...

You need help!

And we're here to help you

We feel your pain...

So be sure and push the right button.

If you select the wrong button you might be cured of someone else's problem and that would just be too wierd!

HURRY UP! You're going too slow!!!!!

Just be sure and pick the right button!

(I just know you'll pick the wrong one!!!!)

The right one OK? I have faith you

(As if... You're a loon!)












Not sure which option is right for you?





Then go Here

It wont help you decide, but hey, life's like that sometimes!












But whatever you do...







Or don't do for that matter...













Pick the correct button!












That button might be numbers 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 or possibly 10.







Its hard to say for sure...













Oh wait, there's not a 10! 10 is just 1 + 0!

But 1 + 0 = 1 I thought... so there are two 1's! Now how fair is that!












Of course, you could also utilize our # or * keys as well if you think it might help







(It wouldn't, you're really screwed!)







But We don't mind...




(that's the royal "we" I'm just one dude)




(in case you were wondering....)



Really, those could be fine choices (Not!)!





That reminds me of that great book, "I'm OK, But You're Pretty Messed Up."



















And let's face it... you are pretty messed up!













Not like that's a bad thing of course...











Anyway, you're looking for help and here I am just gabbing away!




Sorry...












But as long as you're here anyway, why not drop me a line?


Contact


What do you have to lose, just say "Hey!" or something!



I'm sooooo lonely without your message

I thought we were friends...




Why wont you write?







You know... 9 out of 10 Shrinks recommend sending messages to people you don't know as a sure step toward normalcy
(The other one's a nutcase, don't worry about it, he still uses a Remington typewriter!)





(Whatever "normal" is!!)










You sent me something!!! Thank you!




You like me! You really like me!!!!








Hey!! You didn't send me anything?




I just checked!







Please Do!











It wont hurt a bit, I promise






OK -- Here it is...











Again...!








Not trying to guilt trip you but .... Jeez Louis!







I did post the dang form here already for you...










You could have written something then!






Now I have to do it again!

Oh where did I leave that html snippet!

Here it is...

Just write something already and hit "submit query!"

Its not that complicated! A monkey could do it!

NO! Query doesn't mean... Just do it!










Come on... You know ya' wanna!

Anyway....

Here it is (again)...

Mail Me
You sent me something right?

I'm trusting you!

If you don't do it I could develop a whatyoucallit...

An inferiority thingy... complex...

Sort of like you

And that would just be too sad!






No offense...

OK, so here's the buttons.

Choose wisely!

If you are not sure which ones to pick, go Here





But you got that part though I bet!







So...
Please CAREFULLY select from the following numbers --
-- I know you didn't do too well in math, but you can handle this! Trust me!














The War of the Numbers continues! You decide!



1. Who will win?
# 1
# 2
# 3
# 4
# 5
# 6
# 7
# 8
# 9
None of the above
All of the above
Huh?

2. Why did you pick the answer you did?

Don't take life too seriously,

You're not getting out of it alive no matter what you do!







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